Living the life you want – by writing a better story

Your own story – Stories are an important part of life, they define who we are, our values and inspirations and aspirations. They define how we got to where we are in life and more importantly where we are heading.

“If you don’t know where you are going any road will take you there”.

So it makes sense to take charge of your own story so you have clarity of your end destination. Through, images, sounds, feel, smells and tastes stories can transform the factual into actual.

A story of a baby elephant

Here’s a well known personal development story that captures human nature:

When a elephant living in captivity is still a baby, it is tied to a tree with a strong rope every night. Because it is the nature of elephants to roam free, the baby elephant instinctively tries with all its might to break the rope. But it isn’t yet strong enough to do so. Realising its efforts are of no use, it finally gives up and stops struggling. Having tried and failed many times, it will never try again for the rest of its life.

When the elephant is fully grown, it can be tied to a small tree with a thin rope. It could easily free itself by uprooting the tree or breaking the rope. But because its mind has been conditioned by its prior experiences, it doesn’t make the slightest attempt to break free. The powerful elephant has limited its present abilities by limitations from the past.

Human beings are exactly like that elephant except for one thing – We can CHOOSE not to accept the false boundaries and limitations created by the past….. We can write a better story.

How your own story changes your minds

Now this is where neuroplasticity comes in. It turns out that every time we think a thought a neuropathway is laid down in our brains. The more often and more strongly we think a thought, the stronger the pathway. The other good news is that the pathways we neglect to hold in our thoughts fade over time. Its a bit like a path in a field, if we don’t walk on it it gets overgrown and soon disappears.

Stories are rich ways of thinking. They contain facts, sensory rich information, relationship, as well as emotions which significantly increate the strength of the neuropathways. Walt Disney called this “Imagineering”.

So if you are feeling stuck and want to break free, rather than fight frustrations, difficulties – relax and write a story about a better future. Fill it with images, sounds, feelings, tastes and smells. Also include the wonderful consequences the new way of thinking will bring to you, yours, and the community in general.

And because the mind can’t tell the difference between imagination and reality the more we can make our thinking real the better. Making our new stories engaging and desirable creates a mindset that is looking out to make that new story real.

This is where vision boards, well formed outcomes and goals are so important as they design our futures.

Remember: Its easier to builds a new habit (story) than change an old one.

Ground it in real time and space

And finally to ground the story in time and space – build into the story the first small step you will take to make your new story happen, i.e. the how and whens. It doesn’t have to be a big first step, something like switching the computer on and doing a google search. That one step makes the story real and all we have to do then is continue taking small steps.

Making use of stories in Hypnotherapy

As Viktor Frankl said, we are meaning making machines. We take what is going on in our lives and make a story out of it. Often we are victims of the stories. That’s when people come to therapy or coaching or trainings – in order to change their story to something better.

In hypnotherapy we help our clients write a better story through:

• Telling a story of how the brain and the two minds within it work ( see Solution Focused Hypnotherapy). Understanding how the mind works helps us orientate ourselves, so we know when we are working form the negative mind and can take action to recover the move positive and resourceful mind.
• Raising our serotonin levels through telling a story of what is good in our lives, in the here and now. Often when we are trapped in unhelpful stories we miss out on what is good and all the feel good chemicals that are generated when we notice the positive.
• Helping us empty our stress bucket by sleeping better. When we sleep better we empty all the stresses of the day through REM sleep – Rapid Eye Movement. When our stress bucket is emptier we have greater access to the positive part of our brain where we can start to imagine a more positive future.

So these are some ways in which stories help with change in our lives.

Book your FREE Consultation

So if you would like help in writing and building your new story contact me at ACT Hypnotherapy for a chat . Together we can get focused, design goals, overcome limitations and take steps to achieving personal success. At ACT we have all the tools you need: coaching, training and hypnotherapy.

Accreditation:National Council of Hypnotherapy (NCH), Association of Solution Focused Hypnotherapy (AfSFH), Association of Neuro-linguistic Programmers (ANLP)